All about the good the bad and the down right hilarious moments of owning (or being owned by) pets!

Saturday 28 February 2015

Freya Makes a Friend -Pupdate

Hello folks! I am happy to present to you all a pupdate (puppy update, I know I am a comic genius) about Freya.

One of the family has also recently got a puppy, yes we all love pets and chaos, called Poppy. Poppy is a Cavachon (a mix between a Bichon Frise and a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel) so is small and fluffy and rather full of beans.


So naturally both being puppies fun and chaos ensued at their meeting!


It is a really good idea to socialize puppies with other dogs from a young age because it helps teach them how to play properly and helps stop issues like puppy biting and overly rough play with humans. Freya herself had an issue with puppy biting and is much improved having been able to socialize and play with a pup roughly her age.

Despite her small size compared to Freya, Poppy pretty much always won the play and enjoyed laying all over Freya's head! Needless to say they bonded quite quickly and became best of friends.





I would recommend letting puppies socialize as its so helpful to their development, if you don't have access to pets within the family there are things like puppy training and dog parks where you can let your furry friends have a pow-wow.

So that is the pupdate folks, Freya now has a new best friend and is doing really well in her socialization training, the puppy biting is much improved as well. Puppy antics sure are cute!

Stay tuned for more pupdates, stories and tips folks! 

Monday 23 February 2015

The Cat-Flap Story.

So recently we have had to do some 'home improvement' owing to the fact that Freya, in all her puppy wisdom, decided that cat litter was in fact fine dining and spent a vast amount of time trying to sneak into the bathroom and stuff herself.

After much deliberation we decided the solution would be to instal a cat-flap into the bathroom door.  Which we did... Thus we spent the best part of a week trying to show the cats how it worked, poking it open from both sides and holding it up for both of them to go through. Godric kept trying to push the bottom of it as if that would lift the flap and Loki would stare at you through it until you opened it for him.

We tried food and toys, coaxing and reassurance but or efforts were in vain! Our cats really don't get the concept of a cat flap, so much of the week was also spent being butlers for their whim to enter and leave the bathroom.

What our cats do get however is holes. So we had to actually had to remove the flap itself leaving us a nice framed hole in our bathroom door so the cats can get to the litter and Freya can't. Given our cats particular personalities I have dubbed this the 'portal of perv' because for some strange reason they both seem to like watching folks on the toilet.

We are all betting Freya will get her head stuck in it at some point... Stay tuned for pictures and stories!

Saturday 14 February 2015

My cat is an asshole... (why I love Feliway)

There is no easy way to admit to yourself that your pet is a jerk, even though most cat owners know deep down that their cats are at least a percent of a jerk, I mean cats are cats right? They knock glasses of water off of sides, meow and poke you at 6am because they want food, general cat jerkiness.

So what makes Loki different from this normal level of jerk cat and pushes him into full on asshole territory?

Biting... all the damn time. Loki earned the middle name of Oni (meaning demon in Japanese) because apart from his mischief antics, like being found half way up the curtains or on the tops of high cupboards etc, he had a penchant for attacking and biting humans.

So what exactly is Feliway you may be wondering and why do I love it so much? Well to start I shall give you a link to the product on a site I use a lot to order it. Feliway is a product that calms and soothes cats via the use of cat pheromones, making it completely odorless to humans and other animals. It comes in a plug in and a spray but we tend to just use the plug in.

So why do I love it? Well Loki could almost be the poster child for this product. No really I am not joking if the makers are reading this my cat could sell your product big time! Also THANK YOU!! When the Feliway is plugged in Loki goes from angry attack cat / mrbiteyourface to the most sweet and loving cat you have ever seen. He loves kisses and cuddles and will wash your arm forever with sandpaper kisses.

When we run out, which we sadly do as this product is a tiny bit costly and generally lasts 4ish weeks so sometimes runs out before payday, we are damn near held hostage until it arrives. Day one without Feliway Loki becomes grumpy and offish which is not to bad. Day two without Feliway he starts becoming increasingly aggressive and by day three he is back to full blown asshole mode, biting people in the head and generally being horrid to Godric.

I would recommend any owner of a troubled cat to get this product because it has literally changed our lives. Loki is so much happier and affectionate, isn't territorial anymore (we had issues with him... erm... marking people as well as objects) and is just generally the cat he was meant to be. It has also worked wonders for Godric the neurotic one.

So there you have it, Loki is still a menace but a much more loving and happy menace.


I am just going to leave a link to Feliway's website here so you can check it out for yourself.

Saturday 7 February 2015

Say goodbye to loneliness, also to your privacy! (Things you need to consider when owning a pet).

For anyone that considers owning a pet they must be prepared for this fundamental truth that any pet owner will tell you, kiss goodbye to your privacy!

You see cats and dogs don't see the world the way we see it. A cat thinks nothing of bothering you on the toilet or even settling down for a cuddle, a dog thinks nothing of it either.

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 As the very talented maker of this comic meme knows pets simply have no respect for personal space or decorum or boundaries or any other human nonsense like that.

You will definitely one hundred percent not be lonely, (your four legged companion will not give the opportunity for privacy enough to get lonely, except maybe rare moments when they sleep and you will be grateful when they sleep, they are nicer asleep...) instead you need to get used to a few fundamental things, the downsides if you will on owning a pet,

Things you need to put up with when owning a cat / dog:
  • Home is where the pet hair sticks to everything but the pets! -No really I am not even kidding, get used to having cat hair in your morning beverage and all over the furniture and all over your clothes and pretty much everything you have ever owned. When you own cat everything is cat. The same is true for dogs. Pet hair is both a condiment and fashion statement. Some people hoover a lot and run around with lint rollers but most just get used to the inevitability of it all. 
 
  • Dogs drool, cats...dribble... -Yeah you heard me! Mostly everyone in the universe is well aware that dogs slobber and drool and frankly produce a staggering amount of saliva, its become part of our shared collective knowledge of jokes, used on sitcoms regularly to get a laugh, the dog shaking drool all over expensive stuff. What you may not know is that cats also dribble, some more than others. Cats dribble for many reasons (and in some cases when no reason is present can be a sign something is wrong) most often cats dribble when they are excited and/or hungry, just like dogs. I have had many a time where Godric has been cuddly and has purred to such an extent he has dribbled into my mouth, yeah lush I know. Prepare for the saliva, love it, embrace it.

  • No personal space ever! -As has been stated before pets will follow you everywhere, they will steal your sofa, your bed and generally any space for sitting or laying that you ever considered yours. The floor if they are on it suddenly will be at least 60% smaller than you remember it. Dogs at least seem to have some excuses when it comes to stealing the bed as most often they are on the large side but cats are terrible, there has a been many, a largely sleepless, night where I am curled up into as small a cube as I can psychically get while the cat is stretched across 3/4's of the bed, wondering to myself how something so tiny can take up such a large amount of space. 

  • They will try to 'help' with everything. If you drop an object in this house one of two things will happen, either a cat will materialize and then endeavour to 'help' by batting said object around the room while you plead for them to stop or a dog will materialize and carry off said object with you pleading that they bring you it and drop it, chaos. They help you dress, often times by sticking their heads into your clothes as you attempt to put them on resulting in a dog with your pants on their head or a cat-headed-jumper-monster. 

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In short you can expect noise, chaos, and a total lack of privacy in the pet based anarchy that will become your life.

However, its not all bad. Everything I have detailed here pales in comparison to the amount of love that your pets will give you. A pets love is utterly unquestioning, has no conditions or strings what so ever and can make your life complete. Pets are extreamly rewarding, will listen to you without ever judging you and their antics at times can be side-splitting levels of funny.

A pet can be one of the best cures ever for loneliness and I know my life is that much richer for having mine in it, the good and the bad. They teach us to be better versions of ourselves because they do think the world of you, yes even cats are incredibly loyal and love their humans despite how aloof they appear.

Its a big commitment getting a pet and you shouldn't unless you are prepared but its is well worth the downsides!

Tuesday 3 February 2015

Introducing the Stars!

I would like to kick this blog off by introducing you to the main stars of the show! Our new Puppy Freya and our two cats Godric and Loki.


This is Freya Rosa the newest addition to our mad house! She is a Golden Retriever, her breed means she is dopey and loving with a winning 'Golden Smile' and she loves to chew. She is a smart little cookie but don't let the cute face fool you she is a complete mischief maker. Follow her progress and exploits as we train her and integrate her with the two cats. 

This handsome chap is Loki Oni a tabby moggy who was rescued from under a van, sadly it looked like he had been dumped outside as a kitten but he is now doing well. He is a complete menace who is always getting into trouble (running up curtains, dashing around and picking fights with our other cat) he is however a secret softie and likes hugs and kisses (with Feliway in the house at least) he may be a bugger but he is a very loveable bugger! There are plenty of stories I have to share about this little guy and with his rascal attitude I know there will be loads more to come!


Last but by no means least we have Godric Dagda, he is a grey moggy who is highly neurotic but incredibly loveable. Godric is the oldest of the pets so far. He likes sunbathing best and can be a bit anti-social and grumpy at times but wants nothing more than to cuddle up and nap, unless there is ribbon and then its game time! I hope you enjoy hearing about his mad moments as much as I enjoy watching them!


Welcome to Tales off the Paw!

Hello all and welcome to my brand spanking new blog Tales off the Paw. Here I aim to provide you with tips, tricks and funny anecdotes all about my host of  unique and oftentimes hilarious pets. I aim to have something to make every pet owner or prospective pet owner smile, if you are looking for tips, just want to share in my trials and tribulations or laugh at some of the silly stories I have to share, then come in sit and stay a while! :)